She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize
