i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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