Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
