We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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