Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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