her vagine was all disorganized.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
