At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
