we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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