Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
