she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
