We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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