I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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