Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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