kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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