$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Randomize
