This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
