Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
