is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
My dad just said "fuck circus"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
