Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
