I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
