We're like a lot better than the average bears
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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