Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
