I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
