Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
