so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
