My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
