a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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