Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
