life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
