i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
