I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
