idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
