You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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