No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
