I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
