Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Will exercising make me less horny?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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