he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Randomize
