she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
