i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I wish i was in the wii world.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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