doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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