party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
