I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Go christen that room with your naked body.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
