i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Sorry about my life...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
