brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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