doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
