Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
