Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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