ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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