Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
