So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
