he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
